Take the stairs

Tara has made me remember another thing this week. Speaking of how she influenced someone to take the stairs, I was reminded of an advertising campaign I really liked by The British Heart Foundation, the campaign was called The Big Red Fight Back and featured groovy posters that were designed in an art style used for wartime propoganda. The one I was reminded of was about stairs being your friend, an image of the poster is above. I thought the campaign was a great idea.

Movies I watched this weekend

It's an older film now but I watched Re-Animator last night. It made me laugh with the over-the-top gore and silly plot. As a fan of gore horror, I enjoyed it and the acting was brilliant.
I also watched Girl From Next Door which starred Emile Hirsch and Elisha Cuthbert. In honesty, it was a film I watched only to see Elisha Cuthbert. It turned out to be quite different from what I was expecting and not in a good way. As the film closed I just thought what a wasted opportunity it was to have such a good cast and still to end up with such indifferent fodder. The cast looking great is about the only thing it is worth watching for.

Childhood memory

Tara's trespassing post reminded me of one of my earliest childhood memories, not about the act of trespass though.

It was in my pre-nursery/pre-school years so I must have been under 5. The airforce did recruitment open days every year in our town, they had a couple of planes, a mobile caravan and various other events and displays in an area of the town. My mum must have thought I would be interested to see a jet plane up close. They had two sets of narrow stairs up to the jet's cockpit and there were a lot of guys crowding in on both sides. Somehow my mum managed to get up the stairs carrying me and I don't know if I was a special case or not but she was allowed to sit me in the pilot's seat. Great! What a treat! Then it all went wrong for me. Seems such a silly thing now but the guys were all crowding around and were interested in the flight joystick, that's where their focus was - I think an airforce man was moving it around and telling the other guys about it while I sat quietly. Being an infant I was naturally curious, so as soon as he let go of it I grabbed hold of it. It must have been amusing because all the guys erupted into laughter. That cockpit turned into a pit of hell as all the attention turned on my young self. I was probably a bit frightened when they all started laughing and it was really laughing at nothing but my infant curiosity however I remember crying and wanting desperately for my mum to remove me from the cockpit. What should have been an enjoyable experience became something much less pleasurable.
It was an experience that has stayed in my memory for a long time. I often have to talk to groups of people for work, often times they are strangers to me and I have no problem doing that. I am in control and am confident. However, when I find I am suddenly the centre of attention in situations where I haven't been warned or haven't instigated it, I hate it. The simplest example of this is when I join a group of friends at a pub or restaurant and they are already there and seated. They might be talking and laughing about something completely not related to me but as I walk in and hear their laughter, my sensitivity is "are they laughing at me?". I am suddenly thrown into the limelight and I dislike it intensely - I much prefer to be part of the group from the beginning or walk in with someone else. We all have insecurities, this is mine.

It's been a while....

It has been a few weeks since my last update. I'm afraid a lot has been going on and it has mainly been all work related, hence the lack of time to look at blogs and blog about social stuff.

We're having a new fence in the garden this week. A nice man from the Czech Republic is doing the handiwork for us. I'm so bad at DIY that this was the best option to have the work done quickly, I usually take too long and end up not doing the job properly.

We have a long weekend here in the UK, Good Friday and Easter Monday. The weather has been a bit grim, grey and drizzly. My wife and daughter went to the seaside but the shops were shut and the weather defeated them. As I write this, they're currently on their way home. My son has been ill this week. So I stayed home with him, mainly playing Mario Kart.

This afternoon, I set up Twitter - you can read my Tweets just over there -> somewhere.

Friday 13th

Its Comic Relief Day today, a great institution. There'll be plenty of silliness in places of work and education today. My daughter and son have gone to school wearing red clothes because paying a pound to charity means they can dress in non-school uniform. My daughter is also wearing her red wig - she looks a bit like Annie or Shirley Temple or Ronald MacDonald. I hope they raise a record amount of money because everyone needs cheering up in these hard times.

What else has been on my radar recently:

• Jade Goody - she has cervical cancer and it has spread, which effectively means that she is not going to recover. She became a celebrity after appearing on Big Brother 3 in 2002 and has since remained in the public eye due to some rocky professional and personal experiences. I haven't yet formed a solid opinion about Jade, I have heard criticism of her fund raising for her children however I'm not sure I wouldn't do exactly the same if I had to
• Spring-like weather - despite sometimes feeling very cold, the weather recently has definitely been changing more to mild and it makes me happy to think of Spring coming
• Colds - along with the weather change it is bringing the family down with coughs and colds as usual
• Swimming - I actually managed to swim 3 widths in the pool on Tuesday so I think I'm making good progress, I'm actually sad when the time comes to end the session, there are some nice people also attending the class so its nice in a social way too

That's about it for now. Hope today is a good day for everyone, despite the date! Have a great weekend!

Here it is, March...

My wife has lost a ticket. One of those times when we win something and the ticket goes missing. Actually, its not our winning ticket, she runs a syndicate. How can a ticket just disappear? Well, it has and cannot be found - believe me, we tried. It has gone into the ether, the thin air. So apparently has the 75 pounds along with it. To each person in the syndicate it is a small amount but any win is a win and it just so happens that a ticket with a Post-It note attached to it decided to get itself lost on the very week the ticket was actually worth more than it cost. So frustrating!

I'm feeling slightly more upbeat than usual this Sunday evening, next week I'm off work and instead am attending a course. I'll probably end up feeling really tired and stressed because there are exams at the end of it but really just lately I'll take any excuse to do something different.

This weekend I actually managed to sit down and catalogue our movies. I was supposed to be working but the computer was on and yadda yadda I ended up doing the cataloguing and then couldn't find the willpower to stop. So, do you want to know how many films there are? It's frankly disturbing but we have over 430 films ranging from the 40s to the 00s. That's 32 days and 11 hours worth of back-to-back movie going. Sheesh!

Well bless my soul! In the course of me writing this the ticket has turned up! It was in the smallest crack between the computer desk and the chest of drawers - but right at the back. How it got there is still a mystery but at least the ticket has been found and my wife avoids the embarrassment of having to explain about the loss. She found it, as I'm working on my computer upstairs.

My swimming is going quite well. I am starting to enjoy the water and I didn't ever think I'd feel that way. I can see myself actually swimming soon, it is just a matter of time and patience. I never thought I'd be able to. I think I'm so determined to conquer my fears this time that it will come eventually.

What happened to February?

The month is slipping by fast. The weather is getting a bit milder, so I feel more upbeat about that. It was a downer feeling so cold and the dark nights are moving further back.

I heard this news story about the final bag of Woolworth's Pick & Mix sweets being sold through e-Bay for charity. Great idea but shame about Woolies closing, I just thought that store had so many retail outlets that its presence on the high street was rock solid. Just goes to show that you can't take anything for granted.

Last week I had some time off from work and it was great, it's just such a pity that I had to return to work. It was nice not to have to do anything but spend time with the kids. We had great fun unlocking extra tracks and karts on Mario Kart Wii. We did buy a camcorder, so I hope to put up some videos at some point - when I've worked out how to do it and what to record.

We went out last night for our last Chinese meal for hopefully a while (need to lose a few pounds again). We also played a game of ten pin bowling with friends and their kids. It was a pleasant night out but I didn't sleep very well - I think it was the feeling of returning to work and the food lodged in my belly.

In other news, I've started looking out for a new job. Not sure what I want to do yet but I'm scanning regularly.

More of the white stuff

I was back from my travels North last night. And this morning I was awoken by my wife at 5:20am, she was getting up and looking out of the window. Fresh snow had fallen, I actually thought it looked worse than it had done on Sunday night. Here is a photo from back of the house looking to the garden.

Weather

The weather on Sunday turned bitterly cold, wind from Northern Russia I think. Then late in the afternoon and overnight the snow fell. Several inches on our town and as usual a bit of snow has brought everything to a near standstill. The schools closed in large numbers. My own kid's school was open but it too had closed by lunchtime. Here is a shot of the road I was waiting on - the traffic was slow but it was at least moving, except for this shot I was actually waiting at traffic lights.

I love the snow when I don't have to travel in it. I might have to travel further North today or tomorrow and the snow was moving in that direction. Last night the snow turned to ice around here, I think that's worse than the snow.

John Martyn, a hero passes away

My calendar now has a photograph of the lovely Cristina Scabbia from Lacuna Coil on it, man she's gorgeous!

Since my last post, one of my all time heroes has sadly died this week. Singer and songwriter John Martyn passed away, his songs were of great comfort to me. They always brightened my mood. He was one of those artists that didn't ever compromise, so some of the music is not so easy to get into - you have to absorb it and let it wash over you but once you get it, it is some of the most beautiful music you'll ever hear. Thanks John, Rest In Peace.

I'm now booked on an adult swim class on Tuesday evenings. This was one of my New Year's resolutions and I didn't want to mention it before in case it never got off the ground but now the money has been paid and I start this week - or next, depending on if I have to work in another part of the country on Wednesday or not, I might have to travel this Tuesday night. So, I'm feeling both a bit terrified and happy that I'm doing something about it. At least my son is still learning to swim, my daughter is already an excellent swimmer. I wish I'd done it sooner but I guess its never to late to learn something new.

Blurry

Doesn't time fly? January is going by in a bit of blur. I missed a friend's birthday a couple of weeks ago, just didn't get around to making the extra effort required; she moved away and I don't see her very often. I do feel bad about it though.

The weather varies here from very cold and dry to mildly cold and very wet. I think I prefer it dry and cold. It's the kind of weather that makes you just feel like coming home from work and getting into bed as soon as you can to keep warm together. I'm drinking lots of hot beverages. Watching the news every night is a bit depressing, hearing about companies laying off hundreds of employees and closing branches. We'd like to move house this year and I don't know how we're going to achieve it. Last year we only had a short holiday away form home for a few days; this year I wanted to go away again but I don't think we will - moving house is going to take precedence - my work is going to get very stressful with a big change coming up and I selfishly wanted to go somewhere to relieve myself of the stress of it. Just as well we're staying home, with the added expense of a holiday, it might have just added to all the stress rather than relieve it. There is so much preparation to get done if we're to move house this year I don't know how we're going to get it done.

It's Chinese New Year tomorrow and to celebrate we had a Chinese takeaway tonight for tea. I could only eat half of what was on my plate - it was so filling! I love Chinese food though.

Obama-tron

Lots of excitement in the States over the inauguration of a new President. It is a remarkable thing that America has achieved. I really do hope that he is able to make a difference to the lives of hard working, ordinary Americans. I can only remember one black UK politician off the top of my head. I expect that people will forget Obama's ethnicity as soon as Washington's political machine starts churning. It does feel like history is in the making though, I think you can be much more hopeful and optimistic when you have a young, good looking leader for your country. You know he has a lot of energy to contribute. Good luck President Obama.

Here I am

Its funny how sometimes in your life you can be in a time of change, with lots of uncertainties and stuff happening all around you and people you know being affected, and in the middle of it all you have thoughts of great clarity. Just when you'd expect your thinking to be muddled or distracted. Its as if the world keeps turning but you see yourself from the outside of a spinning world and you realise that the world is a big place and you do anything (within reason) or lead a life anywhere you choose. I feel that 2009 is going to be a creative year and a year of change for me.

First post of the year

My Christmas holiday is over tonight because tomorrow I return to work. I've had quite a bit of time off this Christmas - or at least it feels that way because I had to take a couple of extra days this week because my children's school started back later than other schools.

The holidays were good for me, I felt we spent a bunch of time together as a family and my wife and I even got to spend some a couple of nights alone together (a first since our daughter was born eight years ago). I saw two pantomimes, attended a carol concert and a wedding. I even had the luxury of not having to get up early in the mornings. All that has to change tomorrow.

I know its the season but I don't want to make any resolutions yet, there are a number of important things I want to do this year but I feel if I put them "out there" I may just end up not doing them. I'm looking at the calendar infront of me and the face of Kat Von D from LA Ink is watching me. I wouldn't want to make her any promises infront of her that I can't keep!

2008 End Thoughts

End of the year for 2008. Tomorrow is a new day, as they say. I was considering relationships recently. I attended a wedding on the 22nd December, it was by candlelight and I guess you could say it was romantic. It was a civil ceremony, the participants were gay, I don't know if they were disappointed by not having a church or not - I disagree with eclesiastical law here (even if I can't spell it!). In the speech there was quite a few mentions of compromise and sharing and the two were linked closely together. What makes love's bonds so strong? Common interests and companionship yes but I also think there needs to be a physical dimension for me; a feeling of pleasure through being close or intimate with the one you love. My wife and I were joking (at least I think she was joking) about a novelty gift she saw in a gift shop recently - it was a wife's bat for beating away her husband's morning advances. Where is this post going and what's the reason for it? I'm not sure. I guess I'm saying that each of us has a different set of needs and a loving relationship blossoms when we find a partner who both has needs we can satisfy happily and who in turn happily satisfies the majority of our own needs. The tricky thing is that needs are diverse in type and they change over time, that'll be where the compromise and sharing comes in. Boy, love is hard and complex.

I shall raise my glass to all my readers tonight and wish you a hopeful and peaceful New Year. God bless.

Post-Christmas Doldrums

Between Christmas and New Year I tend to feel a bit low. It's the knowledge that I'll be returning to work soon and that all of the Christmas celebrations will be over. There is such a chill in the air here outside that it feels much colder than it normally does and we don't even have the excitement of having snow on the ground. The shops are full of sales and people lapping up the items but we're kind of stuck between wanting to do stuff with the kids but not wanting to keep dragging them around the shops. I'd like them to remember more from their childhood than boring shopping trips. It's so cold though. Yesterday we sat in the car watching the kids in a local play park, it was freezing. In my low spirited mood I'm more inclined to stay at home and watch films or play videogames but that's not possible as a parent. At least, not until after bed time. Ughh! I wish there were more things to do as a family around here - or that I was in a better mood to find something more interesting for them.

My Christmas present this year was a box set ultimate collectors edition of James Bond films - all of the films with an extra disk per film of extras, excellent! I also got a scarf, some socks, some skin care smellies and a Game voucher. I haven't got anything in mind yet for a game so I will probably wait until something comes along that I think would be good.

I watched the film SAW this week, I thought it was good and obviously open for a sequel, I have SAW II so I'll probably watch that some time soon as well.

A couple of things borrowed from the public library recently: Fallout 3 (Xbox 360) and Hell Boy II The Golden Army. I'm a big fan of the first Hellboy movie so am looking forward to watching the sequel.

December Song

It has been a lively last few weeks, I've had to do quite a bit of travelling for work hence my lack of posts and lack of time in general. Work in general has been more than a little distracting lately anyway, there is big change on the way and I don't know if I want to stay to go through it all. I've lived through several big changes already and I'm starting to get "change fatigue" - I don't think it actually improves things either, so its all a big waste of time.

I'm set for Christmas, more or less, and I'm actually starting to feel a little bit excited for the children. I was at my children's school's Christmas carol concert in the church and almost welled up the children sang so lovely. My daughter played guitar and recorder in a group at the front of the church. I was very proud of her. Actually, the end of the longest school term on Friday was great for a number of reasons:

• I began my holiday (apart from Christmas Eve when I'm working)
• It was the last day of school term, so the holidays were starting
• My children were both in the church to sing carols and I was there to watch
• The church was a lot warmer because they had installed heaters this year
• My daughter was performing music
• My children were feeling better (they have had time off being sick from school this week - my son missed one of his chances to perform for parents in the school nativity - I had taken the day off, I was upset not to be able to see him but glad I could be at home to look after him)
• My daughter won the Citizenship Cup for the term by being a good citizen in her school (she's been longing to win it forever)
• My son won the Child of the Week certificate for his humorous and entertaining performance of the cockerel in the nativity play (shame I missed the second performance but lots of parents who saw him said he was brilliant)
• My daughter came home with a gold certificate for house points and my son came home with a silver certificate for house points he had earned

I was very pleasantly surprised by all of this good news from the school, it made me forget about my worries at work and focus in on my family, which is what life should be all about.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a peaceful New Year. I hope you spend some quality time with your loved ones this Christmas.

Saturday Night

We're well into the weekend now, it is early Saturday evening and I'm starting to think about getting ready to bath and put the kids to bed. I have snatched a few minutes from domesticity to write this.  You see, this weekend my wife is away with a large group of women who have descended to a large cottage in the forest to eat, drink, dance and have facials. Oh and taste champagne as well, did I mention that? Yeah, so while she's been living it up since Friday afternoon, I've been home with the kids. It's not so bad, there are times when I wished that they could be nicer to each other and times when they are just so moody - but outside of THOSE times we have fun. Today, I had to take my son for his swimming class, so we up relatively early and after swimming I had a bill to pay and we took a trip to the library. Then I had to take my daughter to a friend who was having a party, while she did that I took the boy to the supermarket to get some food. I bought us some root vegetables and hot dogs because for tea I made:

Vegetable and Hotdog Hash! Swede, parsnip, savoy cabbage, potato, sweet potato boiled mashed and fried with lovely hotdog sausages. I loved it, the kids weren't too fond, except for the sausages that my daughter picked out. That's the trouble with kids, you go to great lengths to try something different, buy fresh seasonal veg, chop it up, cook it up and deliver it right to where they sit and then they pick what you knew they would eat and disregard the stuff that would do them some good. At least I can say I tried. Its just a good thing I had a backup cooking in the oven (frozen pizza). That picture was from the recipe although I have to say mine looked almost exactly the same.

Since my wife is enjoying herself, this evening I have plans for my own fun. Last Christmas we got a gaming chair from my mother in-law. It was a very strange choice of gift but who am I to quarrel? I rarely get the chance to get it out but tonight is the night; oh yeah baby! I've bought some beer with a hint of lime that's chilling nicely in the fridge and I have a bag of nuts to consume while I play videogames until I fall asleep.

It may not be champagne tasting and a facial, but I'll be home, warm and cosy. Oh crap, it still doesn't sound as much fun as my wife's weekend! I should get some friends, I really should....

Fitness Freak

I'm generally not fit. I have been trying to spend some time these last couple of weeks on Wii Fit. I bought some running shoes at the weekend:

I found a new discount sports shop on my local trading estate and its great - I got these shoes for only 11 pounds. For the length of time I spend running each week they are just right, they probably wouldn't be any good for your marathon runner but for me they'll do.

My Wii Fit age is around about my real age on average - it was 37 this week, which is -3 years: so that isn't too shabby is it?

Award Time

Hey, I've been given an award by Mrs Hairy Woman! Thanks so much. I would nominate 10 other bloggers but I don't know that many!