Sunday, April 30, 2006
Clothes and personality
Saturday, April 29, 2006
The Rundown
Yesterday, I spent a lot of the day travelling. I had to get up at 4.30am and didn't get back until after 8pm. I hit the sack just after 9pm and had a good night of much needed sleep. I was up at 6.15am this morning though, woken by the kids.
I've just finished mowing the clover. I would call it a lawn but it's more clover and dandelion than grass. My mower doesn't collect grass unfortunately, so its like double the work and it never looks tidy after a cut. The mower only cost us about 30 quid, it's a cheap Flymo. Frustratingly, the power leads I use aren't long enough to reach the end of garden, even chained together I'm still short by about 5 feet - what a bitch! This is the first cut of year though, which isn't so bad to go so long. Once you start cutting though, you have to keep it up otherwise its like starting all over again. The first cut is always a lot of work.
I tried looking at Nicolemart earlier today and the site was down, I'm relieved it's back up again I just checked.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Preparing to be scared...
I picked up a couple of cheap videos last weekend: The Fifth Element and Crimson Tide. Looking forward to watching them when I have the time. I also bought my own copy of Underworld too, it was on a rack in a homewares store, they only have one rack and I'd never heard of most of the films on it but there was Underworld.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
The Crunch
Monday, April 24, 2006
Big Brother Dimwit's A Failure
The news story is here you have to read it to appreciate the cartoon. I thought I could have some fun parodying this - check out my version of events:
This is Jade Goody as she enters the 2006 London Marathon. Our reporter on the scene asks her if she's confident.
Reporter: Are you confident you'll finish Jade?
Jade: No, not confident really. Well I have just come back from holiday you know. Loads of greasy chips and kebabs and after lots of booze you wouldn't be confident neither! Well, you have to splash out a bit when you're on hols don'tcha? Anyways, I'm here to do me best. That's all anyone does innit?
Reporter: What? Do you mean you haven't been doing any training?
Jade: Oh yeah, I done loads of training. But that was before me holiday! I've probably ruined me chances ain't I? Anyways, gotta go - I'm late as it is! Ooo, eck!
Presenter narrates: Jade bravely runs for the first 8 miles, an incredible effort burning up all the fat she consumed whilst on holiday. She perseveres by walking the next four miles, even despite the hostile crowd who jeer and laugh at her buckled, twisted legs and contorted facial expressions. She sweats and begins to look less and less like a celebrity with each zigzagging, knock-kneed step. Eventually she collapses. Oh no! Poor girl. But fear not the ambulance crew are on hand to save her. We spoke to one of the ambulancemen.
Ambulanceman: Yeah, Jade was all slippery with sweat. We got her into the back of the ambulance and I said "Get some fluids inside her, quick!" and she's saying "WKD, I need WKD". But I was trying to explain we don't have booze on the van. Then I said to Barry, my partner, "This is serious mate, if we don't get some crispy duck down her gullet I don't know if she's gonna make it to the hospital".
Reporter: And did you find some crispy duck?
Ambulanceman: Yeah, funnily enough Jade House, the Chinese Takeaway, is just there (he points)
Presenter narrates: Later we spoke to a witness.
Reporter: Did you see Jade collapse?
Woman: I did. She was walking at a snail's pace, zigzagging you know! Only I knew somethink was wrong 'cos she woz steamin', it was like watching a kettle boiling. She's crying and getting all hysterical and they're trying to get her into the van. Next thing she's gone completely blue.
Reporter: Like Violet Beauregard you mean?
Woman: Yes. But bluer.
The End
Dinkums and doodles
If you enjoy viewing the illustrations I've posted on this blog and want to see more drawings collected together, I have started another blog, taking Tara's excellent lead, called Dinkums and doodles. My plan is to run it as a side project to this blog, so I'll more than likely mention what I've posted to it during the week. The first drawing is of a man with a hat. I've always been mad about hats, I love trying them on. The hats I like though are hats my family would never let me wear because I would usually look ridiculous in them. The hat in the illustration is a case in point. Doesn't stop me wanting them though! I'd have a room full of hats if I could.
Saturday, April 22, 2006
St. George's Day
I shall be attending a car boot sale tomorrow. It's held in a field and people pay to bring their cars and set up wallpaper tables to sell stuff they don't want anymore for cheap. We cleared most of one of our sheds last Sunday doing one and we made something over sixty pounds. It's better than dumping the stuff you bought for nothing. I'll be going as a buyer rather than a seller today though. It's funny what you find: other people selling stuff you had as a kid (the number of times that's happened) and it's funny how families all have usually the same kind of stuff lying around littering the place like Sodastreams, old pairs of roller skates, Mastermind, Connect 4, aerobic steppers and old golf clubs. As a seller it's hilarious when you're selling something for like fifty pence and someone wants to haggle you down to twenty, even though it's a brilliant bargain for fifty. Some people just like haggling, like me sometimes. But the difference is that I'd only haggle if I thought the price was unfair and over a certain amount. I don't really see the point of haggling if what you're buying is less than a pound anyway. But hey, that's just me I guess. In a way that's what I like about car boot sales: they're so cheap, nasty and attract all walks of life from the poorest and trashiest to the well off looking for a bargain.
What I do dislike about car boot sales are the traders there in disguise as ordinary sellers. That and people who put far too high a price on what they're selling. It's a freakin boot sale! People don't like sellers who charge too much. We were selling videos for like fifty pence each and we sold a few but other people were selling the same ones for a pound - they ended up taking them all home again, Ha!
We won't be displaying the St George flag, we don't have one, but I'm planning on buying my daughter an England football strip for when the World Cup is on. The first match for us is on 10 June against Paraguay. I'm so excited! I'll reserve my national pride for sports events!
London Marathon 2006
I like watching the marathon on TV. I like to see the fun runners, the people who run for charity wearing costumes like a suit of armour or a telephone box. Honestly, I don't know how they do it? Surely they don't do the 26 miles? Surely they would expire with heat and exhaustion inside a pantomime cow, especially the back half! Those guys are hardcore!
Friday, April 21, 2006
The Queen turns 80
- Technically The Queen still owns the sturgeons, whales and dolphins in the waters around the UK. A statute from 1324, at the time of the reign of King Edward II , states that:
- "Also the King shall have ... whales and sturgeons taken in the sea or elsewhere within the realm."
- The Queen sent her first email in 1976 from an Army base.
- The Queen also introduced a new breed of dog known as the "dorgi" when one of Her Majesty's corgis was mated with a dachshund named Pipkin which belonged to Princess Margaret. The Queen currently has four dorgis, Cider, Berry, Candy and Vulcan.
- The Queen has opened 15 bridges in the United Kingdom during her reign.
- The Queen has launched 23 ships in her lifetime.
- The Queen has given out about 78,000 Christmas puddings to staff continuing the custom of King George V and King George VI. In addition, The Queen gives all her staff a gift at Christmas time.
- The Queen is patron of more than 620 charities and organisations.
- During her reign, The Queen has undertaken over 256 official overseas visits to 129 different countries.
- The Queen has sent around 100,000 telegrams to centenarians in the UK and the Commonwealth.
- The Queen's real birthday is on April 21, but it is celebrated officially in June.
I've always liked the idea of having two birthdays, the real one and then an official one.
Pop Quiz Grail Winner is..........Tara!
From the left top row we have:
Thompson Twins
Scritti Politti
Human League
Next row left to right:
Suzanne Vega
Go West
Nick Kershaw
Talking Heads (under Nik)
Swing Out Sister
Thomas Dolby
Next row left to right:
The Cars
Level 42
Howard Jones
Gary Numan
Nobody got the person whose blog I discovered via BlogMad and what started all this, it was Thomas Dolby's. I really enjoyed a few of the Thomas Dolby tracks, I thought they were really inventive and new. I haven't heard any of the old stuff in years. It was Dolby who famously sampled Dr Magnus Pyke's voice on She Blinded Me With Science, probably a more lasting tribute to Pyke than anything he did himself. Magnus Pyke was an eccentric British scientist, I remember him on TV programmes as an old man in a shabby suit and he had wild hair and waved his arms around when he explained something. I love this information in Wikipedia about him:
Pyke rose to prominence as a young food researcher working for the wartime Minister of Food, Frederick Marquis, 1st Earl of Woolton. Even then, he was known to be eccentric. It is said that, in an effort to cope with the problem of blood donation outstripping local storage for blood transfusion, Pyke suggested using the excess human blood to make black pudding.
I seem to have moved tangentally away from the Pop Quiz award to black pudding, that must be deserving of some kind of award in itself! I have other black pudding stories - but I won't go into those now, it's late!
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Underworld.....finally!
I finally watched Underworld last night and into the early hours this morning. I really enjoyed it, I was expecting something similar to Blade but it was much better. I'll have to write a proper review on my Multiply site but I'm glad I've seen it and want to watch it again now! That, I fear, won't be possible as I'm about a 5th of the way through the 3rd season of 24 and I don't think my wife will let me watch anything else another night in succession.
The other female actress in the film I recognised was Sophia Myles, who I recognised but couldn't place where from. It turns out she was Lady Penelope in the film Thunderbirds, ah! It's very satisfying when you find out what you need to know quickly on the internet!
Hope you like the sketch of Selene.
Pop Quiz Time!
I was going through blogs at BlogMad to earn some credits (they get used up so fast, I can't keep up! I need to employ someone to earn me credits all day for a job!) and came across a link to a blog from someone in this picture. It made me come over all nostalgic and I thought about all those bands from the 80s that were played on the radio, that I don't have on CD and hardly ever hear anymore. (I know there are 80s radio stations 10 a penny on the interweb-thingy but I never remember to put the radio on!). It's inspired me to put together this collage of groups who had songs I liked at the time.
Now for the quiz.....are you ready?
Who can be the first to name all 13 groups? (Here's a clue: they aren't all groups, some are solo artists!). And a very special award will go to the person who names the person in the picture whose blog I discovered this week.
(Gulp, I hope I get at least one contestant, or I could have egg all over my mug!)
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
6 Facts
Six facts about me:
1. My mum has a school photo of me wearing a busby, we were doing some kind of drama workshop. I was wearing tartan trousers too. Oh yeah I was also really miserable and in tears, I think an adult dressed as a girls dolly was holding my hand. You'd laugh it you saw it.
2. I am quite scared by spiders. When I was a teenager I had posters on my wall, one night I heard a pitter pattering of feet. I turned on the light and the noise stopped. Turned off the light and it started again. Eventually I figured out the sound was coming from my poster above my bed. Then I saw it, the biggest freakin' spider I've ever seen in my life. Never quite got over it.
3. I started my first year of sixth form at school an hour and a half earlier than everybody else. I wore a suit that was too big for me and met my Chemistry teacher at the gates who had a wicked grin on his face but he didn't say anything. Once inside my first encounter was with the Headmaster who said "While you're here, you can take these hymn books...to such and such a place". I did the job and then left for home feeling extremely silly and disgruntled.
4. My first videogame system was a black and white system made by Binatone. It came with a light gun attached by wire to the console. As far as my memory serves it was total pants because you just had to point the gun at the screen and it scored.
5. I always inexplicably hated the film Annie before ever watching it. Now I've seen it many times with the children, I actually like the film.
6. I once commonly used the phrase "Sharp as a razor, blunt as an egg".
There, now it's done - I can rest easy!
Monday, April 17, 2006
Band in a Bubble
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Keep Pedalling!
My day started with a trip to the dump to get rid of some stuff that my wife sorted out from the shed in the garden. We've had unwelcome visitors in there and need to clear out the stuff that's been chewed. We're not sure if it's rats or not but its pretty worrying whatever. Especially with kids.
Later on we took the kids to the park. I got the lucky task of trying to teach my daughter to ride her bike without stabilisers. She did pretty well considering it was her first time. I'm not sure how many sessions it will take her, probably more than another couple though. I'm taking her tomorrow again if the weather holds. Practice is the thing! I remember riding a bike was one of those things that seemed impossible to me. I was so pleased when I could finally do it. I was not a natural, I think my daughter will have an easier time than I did.
Friday, April 14, 2006
The Simpsons Personality Test
You Are Krusty the Clown |
You were the class clown as a kid, and you still entertain people. From faking your own death to getting a wacky boob job, you'll do anything for a laugh. You will be remembered for: your face being everywhere, from cereal to home pregnancy tests Your life philosophy: "I heartily endorse this event or product." |
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Tainted Milk, a cartoon by FW
Inside a small coffee house, a man wearing dark shades and a neat suit enters. Behind the counter, a 17 year old junior member of staff looks pensive and nervous. The man orders a coffee and goes to sit down. 15 minutes later he returns to the counter.
OK kid, why don't you tell me what's going on? We've had reports of sour milk in this vicinity. It's making a lot of people sick, kid. A lot of people are stuck on their toilets, afraid to move kid. Talk to me kid and you won't...oh...beginning to feel...strange...what's...happening?
I'm Agent Kobbler from the FBI. It sure is hot in here. Is your heating broken? I said is your heating BROKEN dammit?!
Sir, I don't know what you're talking about! You sure look like shit though, are you gonna be OK? Don't you die on me man!
Whilst the youth is talking the man faints and falls on the floor. The youth instantly believes the man to be dead.
Oh no! Man! I'm going down for this shit! O B'Jesus! My daddy made me! Daddy made me!
The youth is frantic now, wringing his hands. Sweating. Scared. Other customers in the shop are getting up to help the man on the floor. He puts himself between them and the body.
Stay calm people! He was already ill when he came in here. Oh freakin' Jebus! Just sit down will ya? There's no problem with the milk! You'll all be fine, I promise! Oh crap! Look see - I'm gonna dial 911, really. Just stay calm, don't panic! Sweet mother of crap!
As you can imagine. The other customers were not fooled by his weak attempt to take charge of the situation. They all thought "what a jerk!" and pushed him aside to help the FBI agent.
While everyone is distracted, he slopes off to the kitchen to make a phone call.
Final scene, the youth is just making strange anxiety sounds - he's not even talking anymore. He is compulsively emptying milk into the sink though. On the phone, the only thing he's really listening to (ignoring the wailing siren getting louder from outside) is his dad's voice.
Tip it all away, son. Fast as you can. That's good. All away.
The End
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
A fun game
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Entertaining Yourself At Home #146 - Space Invaders
Life on Trains
I have to travel by train tomorrow, I wonder what I'll be able to observe on that journey?
The Halitosist
Nicole's post has prompted me to invent this character.
Name: Justyn Nernst
Occupation: Video rental store assistant
Background: Justyn has recently moved into his own flat. He attends nightschool to study drama and pick up a few qualifications that he didn't get at school.
Personality: He's a shy sensitive person. He is likeable but not over confident in social situations and prefers one to one communication. He has a speech impediment that makes him reluctant to talk to strangers.
Interests: Justyn has always been interested in film. His favourite film is The Exorcist, although Justyn believes it to be real and always faints at the three quarter stage.
Special powers: None but Justyn is completely convinced he has the power to rid humanity of bad breath with his secret nectar. He believes bad breath is more than merely anti-social, that it is infact, the devil incarnate. He showers those affected with his nectar whilst instructing the demons to "Get out of there you foul smelling dog!"
Utility belt contents: A glass vial containing Listerine mixed with his own semen, his secret nectar.
Most surprising fact: He has yet to be arrested for anti-social behaviour (it's only a matter of time)
Monday, April 10, 2006
Strange weather
We've now erected a bird table/feeding post in the garden. It's sort of a black pole with curly bits to hand feeders off and a couple of trays you can screw into place. I saw two birds pecking at the feeder within half an hour. My wife bought it, I think she saw two bluetits in the garden last week and this inspired her because she couldn't remember the last time she had seen bluetits.
I bought a little tiny weeny tripod for my camera at the weekend. It'll be great for taking long exposure photos or photos at the end of the zoom range of my camera. I have a larger tripod but it's too big really. I just paid off my camera today, yay! It's all mine now. I also found out today that I can trim photos in-camera non-destructively. I mean that the trimmed photo is saved in addition to the original. I just need to find the time to take some interesting photos. Maybe I should enroll on a course?
Write a poem about water
Peace,
In my bath
Rivulets of rain, drawn on window
Channels break, reform, connect
Sound is muffled
Isolated, in my memories
You return, silently
Futile, I can’t forget
Our riptide
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Sloppy Giuseppe
I had pizza last night for supper, pizza and wine a great combination. The Pizza Express Sloppy Giuseppe has to be my favourite pizza I think, although I love any pizza with additional topping including onions, spicy meat and peppers - which fortunately gives me a good range to choose from. I'm not into especially thick bases or cheese crusts - I can take or leave those so-called innovations. At risk of being seen as a goof, we tend to buy a cheap sauvignan blanc and mix it with freezing cold sparkling lemonade that is good for gulping down and getting that freeze thing going on between your eyeballs. I love to get that from drinking ice cold fizz!
Saturday, April 08, 2006
Advance Wars
Hey hey, after a spell of several months not buying videogames I've taken the first step again and traded a couple of old games for one I've had my eye on some time - I can tell you. Yep, picked up this beauty today and am pleased as punch to have found it, the guy in the shop said it was a rare find these days. Gamespot rate it pretty highly, so it's been on my Wants list for some time. I was going to get Metal Slug but finding this in the shop was a bonus I was not expecting. I'll have to post my thoughts on it to Multiply when I've had a chance to play it.
I also reserved a copy of Underworld, the film, today from my local library so I hope to be able to say I've watched that soon too. Can't wait for it to come in so I can go pick it up. Should be a week or so.
For Your Listening Enjoyment
Shaving
Friday, April 07, 2006
Hoop Dee Doo it's Friday!!!
On an unrelated note, this week for lunch on two consecutive days I've eaten two brie and cranberry rolls, a sandwich I wouldn't normally have chosen but it was actually very nice. The last one had some red onion on too, I like that. I also like Subway sandwiches - especially their steak and cheese with sweet onion sauce.
Have you seen this story about a man who was found not guilty of drink driving because he claimed Shania Twain was instructing him to do it! How crazy has the world gotten?
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Blanch them greens - don't boil 'em soft
I agree with Prince Charles
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Travels and Coffees
The shot below was the cafe bar where I had a cappucino and biscotti: my breakfast. I find most coffee a bit too strong - I had to add 3 packets of brown sugar to my cappucino. I love the smell of coffee but neat espresso is just too strong for me. I should try and investigate the whole coffee range as I'm sure there are varieties I'd like if I were to experiment and try them. I should take more risks dammit!
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
Sale Videos
Sunday, April 02, 2006
24 Season 2 (and I'm going underground!)
Red Shopping
After reading Ryan's post that mentions a store called Target I've been thinking about this store, which is also red. Matalan is a strange place, I don't know if they exist in the USA but they are mainly clothes with a few Home things thrown in. It's cut-price stuff mainly. I don't think it's similar to Target, apart from the Red. It's OK for kids clothes but I don't usually find stuff I like here myself but it's Red. Did I mention it's Red?
Ever since Nicole's post about Coke I've been thinking about the various flavours I've seen and I've got the taste back for it. I went over to Pepsi for a while I admit. I've tried the cherry, lime, vanilla and classic Cokes so far - I have some cans of Diet Coke classic flavour in the fridge right now. The only variety I don't think I've tried is the lemon. Of course, there's a Blak variety out apparently - wonder if anyone has tried it?